My many STDS have brought me much love…

Let’s here it for the STDS! This is there “Thank you” celebration post, and here to start off the fun is a short ditty by the Herpes Bugtown Choir (sorry there’s no audio –they just formed the group yesterday)  Herpes – take it away!

herpeschoirA

S  – you’re SIMPLY unbelievable…

T-  TOLD you to check before jumping in that bed…

D – DUH… you thought his pubic louse was a grain of rice with legs…

S -  your life SUCKS now cuz you’re SCRATCHING till you’re red…

A special thanks to the bug-town choir! Great job Herpes all….

The reason for my celebration is simple. I am here to honor both the cure seekers of the Itchy & Scratchy show and the readers who simply lust after all things STD, and have given myself and my blog – if not credibility, at least “click”ability.

For your convenience, I’ve posted some handy graphs from my blog stats to visually show you what STDS have done for ME, Surveygirl46.I hope you can see this (Click on the pic and it will enlarge it in another screen for you)

 

staty1

The left side of the grid shows the date 7/30/09. The day I wrote the post on STD mania dating spreading like wildfire! I don’t know if it was “STD” or “wildfire” which did it, all I know is that this post continues to be a topseller – and I’m not even selling anything except for bullshit!  The fact that I have SO MANY STD (posts) on my blog has caused the traffic to increase in numbers till they reach higher than some freaks can count! In fact, STD mania – this one post has brought in 4,693 visitors since its birth on July 30th. God I LOVE AMERICA! And I love the STDiseasers, the Herpes Hottie Hunters. I love the cliques of clymeadeates and those sporting syphilLIPS – and in my eyes pubic lice has always been nice..

And let me tell you this… AMERICA wants its STDS – in all its many forms and variations. Just take a look at these graphs from today and yesterday!

staty2 staty3

And every day it goes on like this – the views, the clicks, the perverted desires for herpified peneye and the like. Although I’m pretty sure TFU is the clicker as far as the search for MOOBS go but I’ll count her in the love-infest – as an honorary member of course.

Yes, Dr Surveygirl46 does not forget where she came from, and tonight I bow down low to all those with STDS or STDreams and say thanks!

This bug’s for you!

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Don’t just “guess” if it’s safe to have sex. Ask Holly!

If you have a Face book account and send “crap gifts” to your friends (the ONLY reason to join, in my book anyway) … then you’ve seen this cute little toy! This is a stuffed “herpes doll”. herpes_1 

            realherp
    It’s supposedly a replica of this.  Which is supposed to be a real live herpe under a microscope, but it looks more like an old piece of Chef Boyardee ravioli to me..  I don’t know WHAT they’re planning to do with this herpe doll, but whatever it is, it hasn’t been done fast enough for me.  So I did something about it.    

Remember those “mood rings”?
  
 
For those of you too young to revel in the glamour of the mood ring – it went like this: You were sold a cheap band of colored glass that was supposed to turn colors according to whatever mood you were in when you put it on your finger.
  
Green meant you were envious or jealous.
Blue meant you were tranquil or peaceful.
Red meant you were anxious or uptight.
Black meant you were NOT in a good mood.  
  
I used to pick out my clothes for school AFTER I put my mood ring on, so I could color coordinate my wardrobe with what mood it thought I should be in that day. For some reason I ended up wearing a lot of black. 
 

moodrings

 
 
 
 
Anyway, here’s my tribute to the mood ring – combined with my new pet cause – Making Fun of Herpes.  The theory behind this new invention is that the Herpified can tote around this cute, cuddly, and oh-so-fashionable stuffed Herpes doll – Holly the Herpometer…(the soft, cuddly herpes thermometer you can HUG…) and based on it’s tell tale color change, it will either be safe to get down or a warning to the other party to GET OUT!
  
Hereeeeeeees Holly!
“YOU HAVE A DATE AND YOU WANT SEX! BUT DAMN! You went and caught herpes, in spite of all your girlfriends warnings to STAY AWAY from guys who live in the park!”
 
BUT DON’T BE BUGGIN!  YOU may have herpes but you also have HOLLY THE HERPOMETER (the soft, cuddly herpes thermometer you can HUG!) She’ll let you and your date know if  its “Go Time” or “Hell NO!” Time…
 
  
                hollyhTAKE5                            
  Here’s how an ad would go….

cleancutcouple2

 
 

alone1herp

 
 
 

Let me know if you think this would sell!

RE: HERPIES HOTTIES – Just Call Me DOCTOR SG46…

NOTE: It occurred to me as some people are STILL reading this post that I naturally assumed that everyone seeing this knows what the HELL this post is based on.  Here’s a short up to date:

I wrote a joke post – “Herpes Hotties” – a few weeks before this one.  It was a satire on STD dating sites that are springing up EVERYWHERE on the internet. I totally SPOOFED on it.  A week after that post was written, I noticed that a couple of “spammers” who advertised Silver Colloidal Cream had “picked up” (or webcrawled automatically etc) my post on Herpes Hotties and ADDED it to their spam website under “Other Related Blogs” to the serious medical condition of HERPES.  I couldn’t resist writing follow up posts.  THIS first post is my tribute to being “picked up” by a nationally acclaimed medical journal” blah blah blah and LOL….

 
 
 
 
The brilliant medical team who verified my amazing work!

The brilliant medical team who verified my amazing work!

Herpes (or a disco club, no one can tell the difference)

Herpes (or a disco club, no one can tell the difference)

 
  

  

  

  

  

  

Good Afternoon Colleagues, Fellow Students, Scientists of the Rocket, and all the rest of you Mere Mortals…

Upon waking this morning and turning on my computer in order to unleash more of my usual mental diarrhea  on the unsuspecting masses, I made a startling discovery!  Or rather, someone highly intelligent in the field of medicine, finally saw in all it’s glory, the Genius That Is ME! 

It turns out that a Google search of “Everything but the Furr” has discovered my work entitle “Be a Herpies Hottie or Date One”  and cataloged it, which proves that my extensive investigatory work into the deep and often mysterious condition of Herpes, and of course the unfortunate “Herpe’d”, has finally gotten the recognition it deserves.  It was published, without my knowledge, in a fine journal of modern medical technology called Colloidal-Silvers-Com.  I fully expect to be receiving a future  national award for this now globally acclaimed piece – maybe the Golden Globe Herpy.  Hmm..

Therefore, I thought it most prevalent to declare my future intentions towards my followers, the herpe’d, and my blog.  My blog is to go under a radical transformation starting today.  The format will contain NO more humor as I have now rid myself of a sense of one and joined the ranks of Pompass Ass – Let me tell you peons, it’s been a looong time coming.  In addition, my blog will no longer be called “Everything but the Furr”, instead, due to the urgent nature of the herpe’d and their right to remain happily herpied it will be renamed “Everything but the Cure”.

I have reproduced for my readers a copy of what the Google search produced, and an excerpt from the outstanding medical breakthrough article Prevent Herpes Outbreaks, and my mention.  Please read for yourselves and join me in my own rising awareness of How Great I Art..

  

Sincerely,

Doctor Survey Girl46, P.H.D.

No more applause is necessary ....

No more applause is necessary ....

  

 

  

  

  

ATTACHMENTS:  

GOOGLE SEARCH:

  
 
PREVENT HERPES OUTBREAKS
 
 24 Jun 2009 by Sandra Griggs
Herpes simplex is ready for Facebook | Mystery Rays from Outer Space; Be a Herpes Hottie or Date One… « EVERYTHING BUT THE FURR; Home remedy for herpes | TheSpiritualHealth.com; Health Blog.  http://colloidal-silvers.com/health/prevent-herpes-outbreaks/
 
  
AN EXCERPT FROM THE ARTICLE:
 
  
 
PREVENT HERPES OUTBREAKS
  
 
“There are eight known varieties of viruses that can cause herpes outbreaks but the occurrence of genital herpes is attributed to herpes simplex virus 1 and 2. These viruses cause common cold sores, chicken pox, various kinds of cancer, shingles, encephalitis, and cytomegalovirus. Here we will discuss how HSV1 and HSV2 can lead to herpes outbreaks”.

“Presently, there is no effective treatment for herpes outbreaks. For some people, having the condition has become a normal part of their life. However, this does not have to be this way because there are available alternatives for minimizing the number, extent, and severity of the STD”.

“First, you need to be informed about how to regulate herpes outbreaks. Learning how to do so is vital in preventing herpes to be transmitted to other people. Most of the people with herpes are even unaware of it because there are no symptoms present” .

 

PROOF OF MY BRILLIANCE IN HERPOTOLOGICAL ACADEMICS (Highlighted for your convenience):

 

Related Blogs on herpes

  • Youthline » Blog Archive » Just the Facts: Herpes
  • Don’t Let Herpes Dictate Your Dating Life, The Dating Guide
  • Herpessimplex is ready for Facebook | Mystery Rays from Outer Space
  • Be a Herpes Hottie or Date One… « EVERYTHING BUT THE FURR
  • Home remedy for herpes | TheSpiritualHealth.com
  • Health Blog
  • You may find the complete article at this link: 

     http://colloidal-silvers.com/health/prevent-herpes-outbreaks/

     

    UPDATE:  At the time of this posting, the author is currently working on her next scientific contribution to the classification and embodiment of the sexually transmitted disease genre.  Please look for her next piece of polished brilliance entitled “GENERAL Warts or GENITAL Warts – The Ongoing Debate Amongst Two Classes of Sufferers on Which is Worse to Live With:  Warts all OVER the body or warts only on the genitals.  The author promises to deliver her usual in-depth investigatory piece of magnificance, in the normal pompass manner.  The author reminds all you haters:  Don’t be a SORE LOSER……

    What a loser....he MUST be sore...

    What a loser....he MUST be sore...