We The People might need to be worried…

Once again, our government has reported that they “almost” did what they promised they’d do regarding promise # (fill in the blank) that’s never been kept.  It “almost” happened… We “nearly” acomplished… It was “within” our reach.  But all we ever get is a Promise Fail notification, like this  headline from yesterday’s “apprehend” update on Osama – an update that’s 8 years late to boot:

 

 Speaking of Osama. Or Obama. Or your mama….COME ON A  – tell us the truth Oh Mighty Whitehouse.  He doesn’t really exist, does he? I mean seriously, does HE?

Think about it –  the government has to be covering up something else, and using a fake beard named Osama to do it.  God knows what it is.  But it’s probably something like two of the security supervisors to the White House getting together and coming up with this:

“Hey, The People might find out we’re really (fill in the blank), so let’s distract them with a “terrorist named “OSAMA”.  What? Of course he doesn’t EXIST.  It’s a ruse. The  TV appearances are just Barbara Bush dressed up in a fake beard, turban and holy robe – she volunteered, can you believe it?  Isn’t she authentic? The guy? Yeah, she’s modeled after a real GUY. His name’s Gurtandeep …something…he’s a famous Iraqis soap star back there, he volunteered to be the model in exchange for getting to break into Lifetime Television for Women.  Look at this news footage of  Mrs. Bush as “OSAMA”. Dressed up she could be his twin brother!”  This should distract The People from our (fill in the blank) for sure.!”

Just kidding. I just thought it was something the Mrs. Bush might go for –  to keep her mind off her offspring’s presidential booboos and all…

Anyway, back to our conundrum – Logic dictates that our national security should consist of the finest minds in world, right? We’re always hearing about how “top-notch” Homeland Security is right? If that’s true then it stands to reason that there’s NO WAY our Homeland Security geniuses could lose someone THAT MANY TIMES  in one decade, is there?  The most infamous, feared and hated U.S. enemy in the world? It Just Couldn’t HAPPEN!  

Then on the other hand, remember the offspring previously mentioned.  Maybe is is true and our  Homeland Security people are that lame and the To Catch a Turbin show is really run like this:

Special Agent Shitheels:  “Special Agent Shitheels to Special Agent Retard, come in Retard”….(walkie-talkie noise….ssssssshhhhhhht)

“SPECIAL” Agent Retard: (walkie-talkie noise……..sshssssht….duhhhhhh)  “Uh dur…..hello?  HELO?  HELLLO! (oh yeah, depress button and speak….) “This is Special Agent Retard calling from the Short Bus.  Project Discount bin Lauden is a washout, repeat, he got away again”…

Special Agent Shitheels: “Got away again? What do you mean “got away again”?”

“SPECIAL” Agent Retard: “He was within our grasp, sir….then…..”,  We “nearly” got that towel-smack when we got word of his location at the new Wal*Mart superstore. Special Agent Clueless saw said offender disappearing behind a rack of double-knit stretch-pants, women’s, size XX-large, evidently attempting to flee the scene.  At this point, Agent Clueless attempted to overtake said offender by diving into said “rack”.  But when Clueless finally came to from being knocked out by a pair of all-purpose granny pants, he was all jumbled up in 6000 yards of polyester.  Have you every waded through 6ooo yards of polyester sir?  It’s damn near impossible to walk.  Anyway, Agent Clueless FINALLY broke free and emerged from the other side of the rack, but by then ….well,  the suspect was GONE!”

Ok if it’s really like that with our Homeland Security Department then I don’t blame them for just saying “we nearly caught him” and leaving it at that. But if they’re playing that game, then what ELSE aren’t they telling us the truth about? I’m not worried about the safety of our country (a lot of wine takes care of that) I’m just curious.  At any rate – If it IS like THAT –  Osama has got to be laughing his ass off at the antics of  the idiotic Keystone Cops and Barney Fifes our government’s entrusted our national security with.  And since they’re so easy to fool, he probably taunts them every chance he gets. And maybe send them postcards “from the other side” like this:

Kind of creepy yet fascinating in a Saudi*Mart kinda way, isn’t it…

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20 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. TJ Lubrano
    Nov 30, 2009 @ 09:52:35

    Psst…come a little closer…just a tad more. Stop! Not that close. Yes. Okay a secret….*looks around*…okay I never want to be jumbled up in 6000 yards of polyester :|!! never ever!

    But you’re very right! It’s all a game! A game I tell you. Playing with our minds, providing us with nonsense news and hoping we will continue to follow their adventure “The never ending search of Osammy”. I think they do it on purpose! Who doesn’t love to get postcards ^_^! I know I love to get postcards!

    But hey! Maybe there is a clue on the postcards! and if you combine them all you will be led to the secret hide out of Osammy! Yes! Or maybe it’s all a lie again…

    Reply

  2. TJ Lubrano
    Nov 30, 2009 @ 16:57:53

    But don’t be! We should feel sorry for the people who don’t get it 🙂

    To think ahead! To see the hidden elements! To look beyond the surface!

    We should be proud to have a brain that doesn’t work like everyone else.
    We are one of the few people who stand inside the box and who think outside the box. Yes something like that. I confuse myself only to see the logic later on.

    *steps of her chair*

    That was my speech for now hehe ^_^

    Reply

  3. surveygirl46
    Nov 30, 2009 @ 18:30:45

    Whatever it is your’e selling, i’ll take all of them…LOL…you rock girl…you KNOW what time it is…

    Reply

    • TJ Lubrano
      Nov 30, 2009 @ 22:43:22

      Woohooo time to party! When I know what it is, I’ll be happy to share it with you! Up till now it seems that coca cola or anything bubbly has a weird effect on me…

      Reply

      • surveygirl46
        Dec 01, 2009 @ 01:48:50

        You should come visit here in the states, or better yet – invite me to Norway LOl

      • TJ Lubrano
        Dec 01, 2009 @ 08:24:37

        Yayyyy Norway! I would love to go to Norway! My dad went there to perform when he was younger! Okay wait. You have to stop in Holland first to pick me up and then we can both go to Norway hehe. Can we also go to Denmark?

        That would be so much fun! Conspiracy everywhere and we are the two detectives who see the hidden things in everything!

        Maybe Freaksmack can roll in the polyester yards…

        But! I’m planning to visit the states in the near future! I’ll keep you postcarded of course!

      • surveygirl46
        Dec 01, 2009 @ 18:13:56

        Dang! I thought you LIVED there; that’ OK Holland is fine too:) TJ, make sure you let me know when you’re in the States; please:) Come to Cali (not to my neighborhood you’d be snapped up and sold in 5 minutes); but we’ll meet at a beach or somthing, or Tahoe!

      • TJ Lubrano
        Dec 01, 2009 @ 21:35:41

        Hahaha! It could have been Norway! What made you think I lived there?

        Of course I’ll let you know! It would be so cool too meet you in person :D! As soon as I have sorted things out with school aka. graduate. I will look into working/living in the States for a few months. Just change of scenery ^_^.

        I would be snapped up and sold in 5 minutes :|…

  4. FreakSmack
    Dec 01, 2009 @ 03:12:45

    I’ve never gotten a postcard. If this post ever becomes a play can I play the part of “Special” agent retard?

    Reply

  5. surveygirl46
    Dec 01, 2009 @ 06:34:36

    I named him after you sweetie!

    Reply

  6. Ryhen Satch
    Dec 01, 2009 @ 08:55:08

    OMG! Hollywood can actually turn this into a movie! Oh wait, you see it everyday on the news. That doesn’t make it any more exciting does it? Then again, how many times did the world end in movie screens but people still watch. I say let them find Obama, I mean, Osama, and make him play the hero… all his costumes should be made out of polyester, of course. Let Bush play “SPECIAL“ Agent Retard.”

    Reply

  7. Sorcerer
    Dec 01, 2009 @ 12:38:46

    when I heard the news on BBC I was shocked..
    this political game is sick!

    Reply

  8. thinkinfyou
    Dec 01, 2009 @ 15:18:00

    LOL! I loved the picture of Barbara Bush dressed up like Osama. You are the best photoshopper I know!

    Reply

  9. surveygirl46
    Dec 02, 2009 @ 05:32:25

    Only cuz you’re young and beautiful and most of the women in this city aren’t – LOL….don’t worry, fluffy the pitbull will protect you!

    Reply

  10. Mr. Charleston
    Dec 03, 2009 @ 01:29:46

    The concept of thinking outside of the box is what’s throwing everyone off the trail. The idea is to stand outside of the box and think inside the box. Helps keep you focused and you can see the whole scene. Especially if you have HD. Then the rats really come to life.

    Loved your captions over at Mr. C’s surveygirl.

    Reply

    • surveygirl46
      Dec 03, 2009 @ 02:33:10

      Hey!!! How are you? It’s good to see you (cyberlly speaking anyway.). Thanks for stopping by, yes, those captions were a lot of fun – i don’t know what it actually says about me that captions are in my head already…i may be going to hell for some of them…LOL…

      Reply

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